Wedding Planning: 5 Ways to Include Your Groom

By  Tommy Peske
Updated on 02/23/24
Wedding Planning: 5 Ways to Include Your Groom

Wedding Planning: 5 Ways to Include Your Groom

By  Tommy Peske
Updated on 02/23/24

Part of the Wedding

Wedding Planning: 5 Ways to Include Your Groom

By  Tommy Peske
Updated on 02/23/24

Giving your groom responsibilities that actually matter will help make wedding planning easier and more fun. (We even have a whole blog dedicated to having a partner that won’t help plan the wedding.)

For most weddings, one partner typically takes on almost all the planning. Traditionally, this responsibility fell on the bride and her family, leaving many grooms to simply pick a few minor options here and there. But it can also leave the bride feeling overwhelmed and stressed out.

As more weddings break from tradition, we see a 50/50 split in most of the planning process. Including your groom in the wedding plans is a great way to ensure the wedding is his day as well. Plus, it will take so many tasks off your to-do list.

Real Responsibilities for a Real Partnership

It can be tempting to assign your groom busy work by letting him make choices you don’t care much about. But giving him real responsibilities will give him ownership of the day and set you up for a great marriage.

Need help choosing what to delegate to your husband-to-be? Keep reading to discover 5 ways to include your groom in the wedding planning process.

NOTE – We’ve come up with pretty noteworthy jobs – these are some big responsibilities you’ll share with the groom. We’re not talking about managing groomsmen’s socks and picking out a song for the dance floor. These things will make or break the wedding.

But we believe in you and your ability to delegate, and we believe in your groom and his ability to step up and do what needs to be done. Greg Jenkins from Bravo Productions has worked with a fair share of grooms and notes that “The groom will come to the planning process with his own talents. For example, the groom might be a ‘foodie,’ ‘wine expert,’ ‘has an ear for music,’ etc. To this end, the groom could possibly be involved in deciding the menu and arranging for taste-testing. The groom could be responsible for hiring the DJ or musicians and create the playlist for the wedding reception. If the groom is the budget guru, allow him to take charge and be responsible for managing wedding expenses to ensure finances remain on track and there are no budget overruns.”

Read on to make your wedding a joint venture that celebrates your partnership and love.

5ways to include your groom-Info

1. Budgeting

You may have dreamed of your wedding day for a long time. You’ve talked to friends and done a lot of research about costs and budgeting, so you have an idea of costs and what you want to spend.

Your groom may have never done this kind of research. Maybe he imagined his partner would take care of most of the planning, or he trusted that he’d figure it out when the time came. This is why many grooms experience sticker shock once it’s time to book the wedding.

It’s time for you to both get on board with one wedding budget. Consider it practice for when you’re a married couple making everyday budgeting decisions together.

But budgeting is more than picking an amount that you both agree on. It’s a lot of research and thought, and you’ll likely need to gather a few preliminary numbers from venues and vendors. The good news is that your groom can help with all that.

Whether you have a list of favorite venues and need their pricing or if you need help finding ideas for spots, ask your groom to do some research. Create a shared email address for wedding correspondence, or have him forward any messages to you.

Once you know the price of your dream wedding, you can work together to create a budget and start locking in some decisions. From there, you can take charge of vendor and venue communication if you like, but your groom will have a better knowledge of the wedding budget and why it costs what it does. Plus, he’ll have more information to lend you a hand when planning gets stressful down the road.

Couple having ideas together

2. Guest List & Invitations

It’s one of the most daunting tasks of the wedding planning process: the guest list and invitations. There’s so much to this one element: creating the list, gathering addresses, choosing invitations, mailing them out, and tracking RSVPs.

What if you only had to worry about half of that? In a way to practice a 50/50 marriage, your groom can manage his own portion of the guest list. This doesn’t mean simply handing you a list of names – it means finding the addresses, filling in the invitations, and stamping them. Then he can also manage the RSVPs for his group.

It may be nerve-wracking to let go of such an important task. After all, your venue counts on you for an accurate guest count, and a missed RSVP could mess up your entire seating chart.

But remember, you are marrying this person for a reason, so you need to go on and put your trust in them. It’s ok if the handwriting on his envelopes doesn’t match the ones you did or if he keeps track of his list differently than you.

Giving your groom responsibilities with actual stakes will show him how intricate the planning process is and allow him to lift a burden from your shoulders.

3. The Wedding Registry

The Wedding Registry is one of the most fun parts of wedding planning. You can pop your registry details right onto your wedding website. Easy and convenient for everyone! You get to choose a list of things you want, and there are so many things you can include.

Many grooms can get excited to include lawn care equipment, video game consoles, and grilling accessories, but all home items deserve the groom’s input. After all, you’ll be sharing the responsibilities of the house, so he can advise on what kind of cookware he’d like to use and what types of sheets he wants.

The registry is not only a great way to include your groom in the wedding planning but also involve him in the process of creating a home together.

Here are some great items the groom can select for the registry:

  • Guest Room Decor: The groom can select what he wants the guest bedroom to look like and choose the bedding, curtains, and decor to go with its new look.
  • Storage Solutions: The way to keep a tidy home is to ensure every item has a spot. Have your groom select some storage items for the registry with ideas for what they should hold and where they should go. This will allow you both to be a part of organizing your new home items.
  • Wall Art: Your groom should have a say in the aesthetic of your new home. Whether he is enthusiastic about decorating or not, a great way to get him involved is to have him find a piece of wall art to register for. Registry sites like Zola allow couples to register for items from across the web, so he can find something from Etsy or Wayfair and have it all on one easy-to-find registry.
  • Personalized Stationery: Begin your married life together with customized stationery. Notepads, pens, envelopes, and return labels are cute details that will give your married life a little more flair. See what kinds of fun items your groom will find. 

4. The Honeymoon

Traditionally, the groom handled the honeymoon planning while the bride and her family planned the wedding. Most weddings don’t follow such rigid traditions anymore, but you can still assign your groom this task.

Want to make this even more exciting? Have your groom surprise you with the honeymoon destination. Find out at the reception or on the wedding night. Even if you’re not one for surprises, it’s still a burden lifted off your shoulder to know that the honeymoon is in great hands.


Couple going to the Honeymoon


Planning the honeymoon is also something he can get his family involved in. He can turn to loved ones for recommendations on hotels and activities, or see if anyone can take you to the airport when it’s time to fly out.

Remember that finding pet sitters, managing vacation days, and creating a packing list are all parts of honeymoon planning, so he should be ready to assist with that as well.

5. Shop for Attire Together

One new tradition we see more often is couples who shop for their attire together. This means it’s not a surprise when you walk down the aisle – your groom will already know what you’re wearing because he helped you pick it out.

Whether your groom loves fashion or knows nothing about style, he still has opinions about what looks good on you. So including him in selecting your dress or suit can help him feel like a true part of the planning. This is one of the fun groom responsibilities that won’t feel like a job – it will just feel like hanging out.

Jointly shopping for attire is especially popular for couples who want to spend their entire wedding day together. Instead of spending the wedding day prepping separately, you can enjoy a relaxing day just the two of you, getting dressed and styled for your big moment.

But if you still want to keep an element of surprise for the wedding, that’s possible too. Here are some fun ways to involve the groom in your attire while still maintaining an element of surprise:

  • Try on dresses or suits together, but keep your final decision a secret until the wedding day.
  • Have him look through some catalogs or Instagram posts to see what kinds of styles and fits he’s drawn to. Ask him what he thinks would look good on you. You can do this with your hair too, as he likely has some favorite ways you style it. Keep all this in mind as you pick out your wedding day style but still keep it a surprise.
  • Have him help you pick out your dress or suit, but keep an element of surprise by not revealing your accessories, hair, and makeup until the wedding day.

Helpful Groom Inclusions for a Lifetime Partnership

It’s hard to let go of essential tasks, but you really can’t do the wedding planning alone. So as you delegate tasks, remember to trust your groom with the significant responsibilities.

This will make wedding planning easier for you and set you up for a successful marriage where you can count on each other to get things done.

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