Best Woman or Person: Bachelor Party Tips and Ideas

By  The Groom Club Editors 
Updated on 08/16/22
Bachelor Party

Part of the Bachelor Party

Best Woman or Person: Bachelor Party Tips and Ideas

By  The Groom Club Editors 
Updated on 08/16/22

Nongendered wedding parties are one of our favorite things about modern weddings, but they present challenges once it’s time to plan the Bachelor Party. Are you a Best Woman or Best Person for an upcoming wedding? If so, you need ideas that are inclusive and unforgettable.

Most Bachelor Party ideas are pretty misogynistic, and the celebrations can leave women and LGBTQ+ guests feeling left out (or even worse, offended). But you still want to celebrate the groom-to-be with his very own party.

Don’t worry – with a bit of creativity and a lot of love, you can plan the perfect gender-neutral Bachelor party, even if you’ve never been a bachelor yourself! Keep reading for our top advice and ideas for a Best Woman or Best Person planning a Bachelor Party.

Choose Accepting Locations

Even if you’re planning the bachelor party for a cis, straight man, you’ll want to ensure that it’s at a location where everyone will feel comfortable – even you. Picking a safe and inviting spot for everyone will ensure that the entire group has a great time.

If you’re planning on a pub crawl, think of places where you and the Groom have had fun before. If you’re thinking of some kind of adventure, look for companies or destinations that are LGBTQ+ friendly. If you’re hiring any bartenders, caterers, or entertainment to come to your house, be sure to seek out gay-friendly vendors.

Invite All Genders

If you’re the Best Person or Best Woman at a wedding, chances are the couple is already tossing out old gender roles. This applies to the Bachelor Party too. Even if you’re the only trans, nonbinary or female-identifying person on the groom’s side of the court, that doesn’t mean you need to be the only one at the Bach Bash.

Unless the groom-to-be has specifically requested only to have his groomsmen attend, it’s pretty standard to have a larger group at the Bachelor Party. See if the Groom has any female friends or relatives who could go on the guestlist.

Consider a Combined Party

A mixed-gender wedding party is usually born out of a close friend group between the couple. In this case, it may work well to have a combined Bach Party for both partners.

After all, the wedding will be the formal affair for their extended friends and family. The combined Bach party would be the truly fun, no-frill party that honors their unique relationship.

A combined party is especially popular for gay couples who share a single group of friends. You can call this shindig a Bach Party, or its new hot name: a Bachelorx Party.

Combined Party

Get Help Planning

This goes for any Best Person planning any kind of Bachelor Party: You don’t have to do the planning alone. You are ultimately responsible for ensuring the party is designed and delivered, but you should not be a lone wolf putting everything together.

Start by asking the groom what he wants to do – this is his party, after all. This will allow you to end the brainstorming and start an actual to-do list.

Then it’s time to call upon the rest of his groom crew and assign different responsibilities. Maybe one person is in charge of starting a group text, and another one needs to plan the food.

And don’t hesitate to reach across the aisle: The other partner’s top attendant (such as a Maid of Honor or another Best Person) can at least offer advice and guidance, especially if they’re more naturally organized than you are. See if you can peek at their checklist, or bounce your ideas off them to see what’s missing.

And if the planning is more than you can handle, turn to professional Bachelor Party planners. Hot destinations will have companies that will do the bulk of the planning for you. And while the service does come with a cost, they can also ensure that the party goes off without a hitch and advise on activities for a gender-neutral Bachelor Party.

Keep it All Within One Day

A mixed-gender party can get complicated if there’s an overnight stay involved, whether it’s a hotel where you’d separate by gender or a VRBO that might not have enough privacy to make everyone comfortable.

If the groom dreams of a weekend away, only take on the planning if you’re comfortable with it. If not, see about planning and attending some day activities and get help from a groomsman planning the accommodations and late-night shenanigans.

But if the groom is happy planning a single-day event that all genders can comfortably participate in, that will allow everyone to enjoy the entire event without splitting up. Plus, single-day events are easier to plan in general, so you can put your time and energy toward ensuring every element is a hit.

Ditch the Rules

Some Bachelor Party traditions are so long-standing, it can be easy to overlook how problematic they are. That’s why it’s often easiest to start from scratch.

Instead of looking at it as the groom’s last big hoorah before getting tied down, consider it a personalized celebration of a person about to embark on a new chapter of his life.

This can also take the pressure off the celebration as well. If it’s not the *last* big party, then you don’t need to have the most fun humanly possible by drinking as much as possible and doing everything you can’t do once you’re married.

Instead, think of things that the groom likes to do, and do them. Does he want to kick it at home with his nearest and dearest? Make it extra by bringing in caterers and awesome decorations. Does he want to go on a big adventure? Think of things he’ll have a blast doing with a group.

So, it’s really about reframing the way you think about planning.

Instead of thinking: “How do I make a Bachelor Party welcoming for all genders?”
Think to yourself: “How do we celebrate this awesome groom-to-be?”

This will help you scrap all the antiquated traditions and instead plan a party that focuses on the groom and his supportive crew.

Prep the Guests

Prep the Guests

Whether you opt for formal invitations or a text invite, you’ll want to be sure and prepare your guests for any nontraditional elements of the Bach party.

Make sure everyone knows it’s a mix-gender celebration or a joint event. If you think some guests may need even more heads-up, feel free to share that it’s an LGBTQ+ friendly bachelor party with all genders attending.

Besides prepping guests for any noteworthy differences from a traditional Bachelor Party, you’ll also want to get the guests prepped for the logistics: How everyone will chip in, if there’s a meet-up spot, and what to wear.

The more guests know in advance, the easier it will be to mingle and have fun.

Fun Ideas for a Gender-Neutral Bachelor Party

Bach Party Tips Infographic

Most Bachelor Party Ideas only need to be tweaked a little bit to become gender inclusive, but some activities work better than others.

Whether you’re planning a nontraditional Bachelor Party for an LGBTQ+ groom, or simply including guests of all genders and orientations, here are some of our favorite ideas to make sure everyone has a great time:

  • A Thrill-Seeking AdventureSkydiving is a top thrill-seeking activity, but it can exclude any guests who aren’t up for the plunge. Opt for bungee jumping or zip lining instead – this will allow nonparticipants to be by your side for most of the action.Another idea is to choose a middle-ground adventure that everyone’s up for, like white water rafting, horseback riding, or rock climbing.
  • DrinkingSure, drinking is the stereotypical Bachelor Party activity. But it’s also sometimes the groom’s ultimate vision for his celebration.Drinking can be as simple as a pub crawl, or you can step it up a notch by going on a brewery tour, booking a cocktail-making class, or heading out on a party boat.
  • Multi-Activity DayMany traditional bachelor parties are at least day-long affairs with many different elements. This works out great for nontraditional and joint celebrations too, since it allows guests of all interests and time constraints to participate.For example, adventurers of all genders can begin their day ziplining, and then everyone who is able can meet up for lunch. The afternoon can include a relaxing pool day followed by a PM pub crawl.Any guests can participate in the activity they’re able to, regardless of gender identity. You can oversee all the activities, or enlist help from the bride’s best person or another groom attendant.It’s more things to plan, but it creates a fuller day for the groom-to-be to celebrate, plus it allows flexibility for guests who may not be up for each element of the party. Just note on the invitation that everyone is invited to any or all of the day.
  • A Themed PartyPick a theme the groom will love, and go crazy with it. Have a fiesta and get everyone big sombreros, choose a Disco theme and wear your best 70’s attire. A Pool Party can become a full tropical bash with colorful leis and Mai Tais. Tom Kelly, CTO for Life Part 2 gave us other themes such as, masquerade ball, casino night, nature hikes, karaoke party, or a food tour.Not only does this make a smaller celebration extra fun, but it can also be a good ice breaker for a diverse group who may not all know each other.

A Bachelor Party For Everyone

Bachelor parties are no longer for cis, straight men, and anyone can plan a fabulous one. So, whether you’re a Best Man, Best Woman, Best Person, or transitioning between titles, the key is creating a memorable event where everyone feels included and comfortable.

So, get ready to celebrate the groom-to-be with a modern, gender neutral bachelor party. He’ll love the thought you put into his party and the wonderful time he has.