How Long Should Couples Be Engaged Before Getting Married?

How long should a couple be engaged before getting married? That’s a question that many couples struggle with, and the answer isn’t always clear. In this blog post, we’ll explore the average length of engagements, the pros and cons of long engagements, and the pros and cons of short engagements. We’ll also offer some tips for couples who are in a long-distance engagement. At the end of the post, we’ll let you decide for yourself whether or not you should wait longer to get married!

Average Length of Engagements

The average length of engagements has been on the rise in recent years. In 2020, the average engagement was 15 months, up from 14 months in 2019. This trend is likely due to couples wanting to spend more time planning their wedding and getting to know each other better before tying the knot. The longer that couples know each other before getting married, the less likely that they will end up getting divorced. This is because they have a chance to really get to know each other’s quirks and build a strong foundation for their marriage.

Planning Destination or Large-Scale Weddings Take Time

Planning Destination or Large-Scale Weddings Take Time


If you’re planning a destination wedding or a large-scale wedding, you’ll need to factor in extra time for the planning process. Destination weddings can take up to 18 months to plan, while large-scale weddings can take up to 24 months.

Destination and large-scale weddings definitely take more time to plan than your run-of-the-mill local wedding. There are a lot more moving parts to coordinate when you’re planning a wedding that involves travel. Not only do you have to worry about coordinating with your venue and vendors, but you also have to deal with travel logistics for yourself and your guests. 

And let’s not forget about all the other details that go into planning a wedding, from the dress to the flowers to the food. Is it really that surprising that destination and large-scale weddings can often take two years to plan? Maybe. I mean, after all, as men, planning huge events and putting attention towards very intimate details isn’t really our thing. But at the end of the day, it’ll all be worth it when you say “I do” at your dream wedding location.

Considering how long it takes to plan these types of weddings, it’s no wonder that the average engagement is getting longer. Obviously, not every couple is planning a destination or large-scale wedding, but it’s something to keep in mind if you are.

Pros and Cons of Long Engagements

Pros-Cons long short engagement Infographic

There are some advantages to having a longer engagement. For one, you’ll have more time to plan your wedding and make sure everything is just perfect. You’ll also have more time to save up for the big day. And if you’re in a long-distance relationship, a longer engagement can give you time to move closer to each other. The best part about a long engagement is that it gives you plenty of time to get to know each other and make sure you’re really compatible. Kate Zhang, Founder of KateBackdrop, says, “When two people are engaged, they have a period of time to explore their compatibility on difficulties that may develop as a legally contracted binding partnership with rights and responsibilities to one another, as opposed to the more casual and easily ended courtship.”

On the flip side, there are some downsides to long engagements. A longer engagement can be more expensive. You’ll have to pay for the wedding dress, tuxedo rental, wedding planner, and other wedding-related costs earlier than you anticipated and make continued payments for an extended period of time. Also, the longer you’re engaged, the more time there is for things to go wrong. There’s also a chance that you’ll get cold feet and change your mind about getting married. If you’re struggling to make a decision, it might be best to just set a date and go for it!

In reality, it is better to find out early on in a relationship that you aren’t compatible with your partner, rather than waiting until you’re already married. So is it really a con that the longer you’re engaged, the more time there is for things to go wrong? That is up to you to decide.

Pros and Cons of Short Engagements

Couples who have a short engagement often say that it was the best decision they ever made. A shorter engagement means less time to stress about the wedding, yet it often feels like there’s more time to enjoy being engaged. It also gives you a sense of urgency to get everything done, which can be a good motivator! Short engagements let you focus on what you’re really excited about: getting married and starting your life together.

On the other hand, some couples say that a short engagement was the worst decision they ever made. If you have a short engagement, you might not have enough time to plan the wedding of your dreams or save up enough money. You might also feel rushed into making decisions about your wedding, which can be overwhelming. 

Plus, if you have a short engagement, you might not have enough time to really get to know each other. And if you’re planning a destination wedding or large-scale wedding, you might not have enough time to get everything done. But if you’re confident in your decision and you’ve got a good support system, a short engagement can still be a great option!

Long-Distance Engagement Tips

Long-Distance Engagement Tips

If you’re in a long-distance relationship, there are a few extra things to consider when deciding how long to be engaged. For one, you’ll need to factor in the time and cost of travel when planning your wedding. The time difference can also make communication difficult, so you’ll need to be extra patient and understanding with each other. Trust each other implicitly, as there will be times when you can’t be together physically.

You’ll also need to make sure you’re both on the same page about your wedding plans. And it’s important to be extra-communicative to make sure your relationship stays strong during the engagement. Another great thing that couples can benefit from doing is making a schedule and sticking to it. Schedules help to provide structure and stability in a relationship, which can be extra important when you’re not able to see each other as often.

Above all,  just remember to be flexible. Things will come up that you can’t control, so just go with the flow and be ready to adjust your plans accordingly! If you’re considering a long-distance engagement, these are just a few things to keep in mind. But as long as you’re both committed to each other, it can definitely work!

Is Our Long Engagement Hesitation or Strategic?

If you’re struggling to decide how long to be engaged, it’s important to ask yourself why you’re hesitating. Are you unsure about your relationship? Are you worried about the cost of the wedding? Or are you just enjoying being engaged and not ready to take the next step?

Only you can answer these questions, but it’s important to be honest with yourself. If you’re uncertain about your relationship, it might be best to wait a little longer before getting married. If you’re worried about the cost of the wedding, talk to your partner about your budget and see if there’s a way to compromise. And if you’re just enjoying being engaged, there’s nothing wrong with that! Just remember that at some point, you’ll need to make a decision about when to get married.

Final Thoughts

So, how long should you be engaged before getting married? There is no right or wrong answer, but it’s important to think about your relationship and your wedding plans before making a decision. Ultimately, the most important thing is that you’re confident in your decision and you’re ready to take the next step in your relationship!

And if you’re still looking for more wedding planning advice, check out our blog for more great tips.

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